Christina's Big Night Out
Christina had followed me into my apartment building earlier tonight. She thought she was going to work and our building was her office. After a bit of incoherent discussion and a few slaps to my face, I dragged her out into the street, where everyone on Bedford Avenue just assumed I was having a domestic dispute with my girlfriend.
Because of the way this looked, and because she'd said she would call her lawyers to sue me, pre-emptively called the cops myself. Through all of the ordeal I just wanted to get back to doing my laundry down the street. That didn't happen. They were closed, with my clothes still in the machines.